You might have people in your lives who stay very joyful and often reach your goals easily. Nonetheless, they suck your life out without any bad intent while staying jubilant and supportive. They always keep you depressed with their undesirable actions. Their manipulating tactics spoil your positive attributes and always discourage your efforts for personal improvement. — Who are they in your life?
They are the ‘toxic’ people — the ‘narcissists’ who are apparently very reasonable but ruin your life quietly. They will take away your self-respect and kill your dreams. They secretly have baneful influence over your reputation and your esteem.
Here is a list of those toxic people who are always around you being friends and maybe family members but in fact, they impede your all improvements and bring you only a setback.
The Control Freaks
They manipulate you often by psychological means and make you doubt your reputation and question what you deserve. Such toxic people hate your self-esteem and dislike the personality you have refined in yourself. You may have friends or family members who love to tell you; “You enhanced a lot, but you’re too sensitive” or “you aren’t the person I like” or “don’t be over-smart”. — They will do anything to control your mind.
Positivity Haters
They always scorn your positive thinking and disdain your faith in your qualities. Every time you want to be positive or confident in yourself, the toxic person will aimlessly point out everything about you; “yeah, you’re right but…” or “I don’t think so” or “no, don’t do so”. — These naysayers will reverse every gain you have made. They’re the people who can’t help in the house.
Wisdom Mongers
They are always attentive and responsive and pretend to have an answer for every question you have. They feel capable to give advice on any subject, regardless of whether they have the wisdom they’re dispensing. — This type of toxic person tries to seem smarter than you, even though they have never been around great people nor they have read a single book in their entire life. Their actions and sayings lack appositeness and always change from point to point purposelessly.
Shaming Vampires
They use every tactic to shame you for your qualities and skills. They come up with negative arguments and hate what you love or what you are. They used to say; “don’t show your skills everywhere, it’s awkward” or “you talk too much, others hate this” or maybe “don’t be outspoken very time”. They become envious at your personal improvements and positivity because they can’t rejoice in your capabilities and competence. — Ultimately, they make you feel ashamed of what makes you ‘You’.
Tonal Monsters
They will speak adequate and fair words but their talking tone will convey something unacceptable and spiteful. Their phrases are like; “Yeah, I know your rules” or “I hope, you fulfil your promise” or “You’re very trustworthy”. They downgrade your positive approach with suspicious reactions — and conclusively, bring you guilt for discussing and sharing things.
Focus Shufflers
They have no responsibilities in their own lives nor have something great to do. Neither they will focus on what you do or what you say, nor they will face any tough situation. They hate your straight forward thinking and well-focused directions. With the phrases like “Ok fine, anything else…” or “leave it, listen to me…” or “will talk about… some other time” — sometimes they will try to make you focus on their issues and interests. They become combative when you talk about the lapses in their arguments or judgments about you. They cause your frustration and have no motive of growing. Undoubtedly, they sap your energy and diminish your good fortune.
Push and Pull Hogs
They are always silly while being around you. These toxic people love to push you out of your limits, then pull you back to your bounds and enjoy keeping you in line. Subsequently, they get you to tolerate and accept them with uncaring and unsupportive attitude. — Often they use to say “calm down” pretending to be more rational and behaving you like a child. Eventually, they take away your self-respect.
Gossip Hucksters
Most of the times, they feel insecure and distort facts. When you try to talk seriously, they hawk their annoying chitchat. They bring inessential gossip to be recognized everywhere and get attention. They have undesirable teasing habit and never let others be appreciated. When you try to solve a problem or help others, they will try to drain you of your positive attributes. — These idlers will tear you down one day.
Cheat-specialists
These people are masters at sucking your blood in the name of love and relationship. Infidelity in the guise of friendship is one of their worst traits. Constantly reliant on the support of others, they allow sinful relations for their own gains and betray you. When confronted, they bite you back to justify their insincerity. They pause the saga for the time being, but the next moment, they produce a new episode.
They continue to receive your support and sincerity without letting you sense their fakery. They cherish you to demonstrate your commitment to them by standing by them in their darkest hours. Once their worst time is over, they feel entitled to trash your sincerity, and love for their own pleasure. As soon as they have another option, they’ll drive the first blade into your chest, feeling no guilt and having no sympathy.
In their lives and relationships, they don’t have any limits or responsibilities. They live like imposters and deceive every one of their loved ones, including you.
Their commitment and promises to you are inscribed in the sand. Your feelings are worthless to them. They do not think twice about making your life miserable and leaving you in tatters with pieces for their own personal satisfaction.
Habitual-liars
I think some lies are not noxious. However, liars ruin their relationships and sabotage their reputation and yours too. They live a disgraceful life with their guilts. They struggle to maintain their composure with multiple fake faces.
They can’t hold their dignity while carrying many fake versions of themselves. They give themselves every rank they do not actually possess. They may be adept in a single or multiple skills, but they consistently lack personal wisdom about anything else. By utilising these worst flaws of them, other people compound their regrets and blunders.
They are their own worst enemy. In real life, they never live up to what they preach. Their words and actions are consistently at odds with one another. They adopt a constant way of life of lying and hypocrisy. They could never be faithful and committed to you or anybody else, not even to themselves and their loved owns.
We all have the toxic people around us who dust us with their poison. After being accompanied by them for years, I learnt how they got me distracted and depressed all the times they were around me. I asked myself the question; “Why should I deal with them who drain me of my dreams and my goals? and the answer was obviously; I shouldn’t. My first step was to spot and then to get rid of them. I started ignoring them gradually and walking away, — progressively.
Other Negative Nellies
There are some more types of toxic people, who drain your brain out and kill your capacity to be inspired. For example; — Cheaters, Habitual Liars, Backbiters, Gold-diggers, Braggers and many more — can poison your life. I didn’t list them above because they had no existence in my life. Nonetheless, I would like to add a few lines about those narcissists too.
Backbiters — They are so nice and caring to your face but as soon as you turn away, they forsake you. Their problem is to get attention and please everyone they face. They lie and twits everything about you when it can benefit them.
Gold-diggers — They have vested interests in your relationship. Beware of them if you have a big bank balance or huge wealth — otherwise, you don’t have to worry.
You too might have toxic people around you, who are profaning your life with their insidious tactics and behaviours. They suck your life out, diminish your self-worth, humiliate your qualities and skills and destroy your dreams. — It just does not make sense to lower yourself to their level.
The call to action is simply to ignore and walk away from the toxic and unnecessary crazy. Don’t let them tap into your zone and keep you hanging in the dark. See your dreams with your eyes. Know what you stand for is what you can do. And you must learn and have the confidence to say “No” to others in most instances.
Take your first step to spot the toxic people and diagnose their harmful behaviours and their impact. — Be confident to own your own faults. You can’t change their doings and way of thinking, but you can change what and how you do with them and how you keep your priorities in line.
To sum the things up — I had read a Chinese proverb: “if you sleep with a dog, you will wake up with fleas”. The toxic people — whether they’re friends, relatives, university-fellows, social media friends or colleagues, — contaminate your life — so why to stand for the abuse? Getting them out of your life will give you a better chance of enhancing your accomplishments and capabilities of growing.
You have a great mind; never let them contaminate it. — You have is a beautiful life; never let them pollute it.
On the other side of the coin; getting yourself surrounded by genuine people will bring you more strength and positivity. They’ll never make you feel regret for sharing your prosperity and growth. They are genuinely proud of your abilities and always delighted by your good fortune.