Expression of Grief

The enduring impact of grief, the transformative power of adversity, and the concept of post-traumatic growth.

Rana Kanwal
Rana Kanwal - Writer 4 Min Read
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In this era of life, the most impactful element on a person is sorrow, something that never really disappears. It’s said that if something cannot kill a person, it makes them stronger, yet with grief, it’s a burden that one never truly abandons. Many of us have encountered or witnessed such qualities in life, experiencing the pain and distress of separation from loved ones, battling life-threatening illnesses, solitude in the face of divorce, unemployment, or other such circumstances. These situations often manifest as stress, bitterness, depression, and constant unease.

It’s a law of nature that doesn’t burden anyone beyond their capacity. Similar to qualities like grief and distress, which become a part of life for a specific period, they leave behind certain positive effects once the cycle completes, effects to which one hadn’t previously attached. In ordinary situations, individuals fail to recognize their inner strength, unaware of the resilience and endurance that lie within them, gifted by a higher power.

Just as our bodies demand nourishment, rest, and sleep, similarly, our soul and mind seek growth and advancement. Sometimes, nature induces a feeling of grief to prompt such development. When life flows smoothly, we often cease questioning its essence. Conversely, in moments of adversity or grief, we delve into introspection, observing things more deeply. While happiness connects us limitlessly, grief reminds us of our boundaries.

Many of us have encountered the pain of separation, battling illnesses, divorce, or unemployment, manifesting as stress and depression.

In recent years, psychologists have become familiar with a trend termed ‘Post-Traumatic Growth.’ This concept was introduced by psychological experts Richard Tedeschi and Lawrence Calhoun. They interviewed many individuals who had gone through near-death experiences, grief, severe illnesses (such as cancer), divorce, or job loss.

In the initial stages, everyone encountered the dark night of the soul, where every aspect of life seemed purposeless. Constantly revisiting distressing events, thoughts, and emotions is a natural process that everyone has undergone. Subsequently, they embarked on a spiritual quest, discovering and questioning themselves on this journey. They encountered numerous moral and spiritual qualities that hadn’t been part of their lives before. Some find meaning and purpose in life. Some witnessed their own helplessness. Some developed more empathy and farsightedness towards others. Some started seeing their relationships from a new perspective. Forgiveness became easier for them, and they appeared more content and peaceful. They also discovered a new path that made them appreciate the little things.

Nature induces grief to prompt soul growth; adversity sparks introspection, revealing resilience and endurance gifted by a higher power.

Life presents us with trials, constantly coming and going and often repeating themselves. Even the great spiritual leaders and prophets faced challenges. Sometimes, for the strengthening of one’s character, it’s necessary to go through trials and tribulations. However, it doesn’t mean we should welcome hardships or actively seek them out. If, God forbid, they enter our lives, we should be aware that, along with their negative aspects, they hide positive blessings too. Strengthening the soul, altering the theory of life, birthing new perspectives, and discovering a superior way of living.

A human life is indeed a journey full of ups and downs, where the expression of grief sometimes serves as a silent teacher, guiding us towards a more enlightened existence.

rana kanwal, rana writes
By Rana Kanwal Writer
Writer at Aware Pakistan, Punjab University ‘Mass Communication Graduate’ and System Analyst in PRAL at the Federal Board of Revenue in Islamabad.
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